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Fall into Reflection

by Amber Tolbert

Autumn is here, and I can’t help but reflect on the past year as I watch the signs of the changing season. There is something therapeutic about witnessing the earth’s transformation. The time for growing comes to an end. Grasses fade. Leaves fall. The time for letting go begins.

Before recovery, my world was best described as one marked by reactivity, impulsivity, numbing, medicating, and dissociating. Living mindfully or with intention were foreign concepts. I just thought I was supposed to react to my world. That was life, after all. I didn’t know a life of recovery allowed my world to respond to me.

Each year, the fall season prompts me to stop that cycle. It gives me permission to reflect and allows for time to ask, “How have I grown since the beginning of the year? What must I shed in order to allow for new growth?”

Answering those questions, letting go of the past, and shedding old hurts and emotions—none of that is easy. But all things that have value are worth the time. It’s a process. A new behavior. A new way of being rather than doing. Living with intention—recognizing how you’ve grown and what you need to let go of—shifts the perspective from outside of your body to inside your body. You suddenly learn what you like and what you don’t like, what you want and don’t want.

As we come to the final months of the year, process the losses and grief you’ve felt. Then, express gratitude for the resilience you’ve shown. Consider just how much you’ve grown and how much you’ve left behind. Fall into reflection with intention.

How might you be different if you did? Would your relationships shift? Would your parenting change? How could mindful living create a different outcome?

You may be surprised by how much clarity you find.

If you would like to let your world respond to you as opposed to you reacting to your world, get in touch! We are always here to join you on your walk of recovery.

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