Addiction and Shame

You are not your pathology.  You are not your addiction. 

In fact, you are so much more.  This can feel like a foreign concept to wrap your head and heart around.  How can I be “good” if I have done so much “bad?”

  Do you ever find yourself asking yourself some of the following questions?

• I have done so much bad in my life, how could I ever think of myself as a good person?

• How can I ever forgive myself for all the bad I have done to myself and others?
• I am manipulative and dishonest, how can I ever mend the relationships I have broken?
• All I know is a life controlled by addiction, how do I stop it from controlling me?

If so, you are not alone.  Addiction has a powerful way about itself to force us into a shame spiral.  The first step in breaking this cycle is learning to separate you from your pathology.  Learning to separate you from you addiction.  I encourage you to reframe the above questions in a manner such as the following:

• My numbing and self-medicating behaviors felt so powerful, that my addiction resulted in many “bad” behaviors, did these behaviors align to who I truly am?

• Addiction sucks. Addiction has caused a lot of pain in my life. How can I show myself grace for all that I have been through?
• Addiction is manipulative and dishonest, and that is my addiction, not me. What do I feel is important to communicate to others so that they can better understand who I truly am?
• Addiction has controlled my life for so long, and I am ready to heal and gain power over my life. What makes me feel empowered?

Recovery can feel like its getting worse before it gets better.  Recovery is a process. You deserve all that recovery has to offer.